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| Introduction | |
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| Is Adoption Right for You? | |
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| Deciding to Adopt | |
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| Finding the Right Adoption Experience for You | |
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| Assess Your Emotional and Physical Status | |
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| Understanding Adoption | |
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| Adoption Has Become More Accessible | |
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| Growing Areas of Adoption | |
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| Adoption by Grandparents or Extended Family | |
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| Older Siblings Adopting Younger Siblings | |
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| Adoption by Stepparents | |
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| Adoption by Single Parents | |
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| Adoption by Older Parents | |
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| Adoption by Same-Sex Couples | |
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| Preparing for Adoption | |
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| Prepare Yourself and Your Family Emotionally | |
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| Preparing Existing Children | |
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| Meeting the Legal Requirements of Adoption | |
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| Preparing Yourself Financially | |
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| Finding the Right Child for You | |
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| Open Versus Closed Adoptions | |
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| Ramifications for Children and Families | |
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| What Open Adoption Means | |
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| What Closed Adoption Means | |
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| Making an Informed Choice | |
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| Gather Information, No Matter What | |
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| Emotional Considerations for Making a Decision | |
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| Explaining Your Decision to Family and Friends | |
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| Studies and Legal Changes on Open Adoptions | |
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| Adoption Outside Your Ethnic Group | |
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| The Implications of Race Versus Culture | |
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| Culture Plays a Major Role in Child Development | |
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| Good News about Transracial Adoption | |
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| Think about Your Own Motives | |
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| Attitudes and Pressure from Relatives | |
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| Strategies For Parenting a Racially Different Child | |
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| Claiming Rituals | |
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| Develop Your Child's Social Skills | |
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| The Ultimate Responsibility Rests with You | |
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| International Adoptions | |
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| Deciding to Adopt Internationally | |
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| Choosing a Country | |
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| Selecting and Working with Adoption Professionals | |
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| Dealing with Other Languages and Cultures | |
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| Dealing with Foreign Bureaucracies | |
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| Preparing to Bring Your Child into the United States | |
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| Handling the Interminable Waiting | |
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| Helping Your Child Adjust | |
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| Integrating Your Child into the Family | |
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| If Things Fall Through | |
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| Adopting Through the Foster Care System | |
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| Various Forms of Foster Care | |
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| Prepare Yourself Emotionally | |
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| Licensing and Training | |
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| Learning a New Paradigm | |
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| Preparing Your Family for a Child from Foster Care | |
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| Understanding the Needs You May Face | |
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| Addressing Community Resistance to Foster Children | |
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| Establishing a Flexible Mindset | |
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| Creating Routines and Family Time | |
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| Finding Support | |
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| Adoption of Infants and Toddlers | |
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| Bringing Your Child Home | |
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| Setting Up a Nursery | |
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| Plan to Take Care of Yourself | |
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| Bonding Techniques for Babies | |
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| Bonding Techniques for Toddlers | |
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| Addressing the Adoption | |
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| Important Recordkeeping Tips | |
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| Adoption of Preschool Children | |
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| Preparing Before the Placement | |
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| If Your Child Starts Acting Out | |
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| Calming Preschoolers' Common Fears | |
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| Meeting Your Preschooler's Unique Challenges | |
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| Understand and Respect Your Child's History | |
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| Important Recordkeeping Tips | |
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| Adoption of Elementary School-Aged Children | |
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| Preparing Before the Placement | |
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| Acting Out | |
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| Calming Fears | |
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| Meeting Your Elementary-Aged Child's Unique Challenges | |
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| Help Others Understand Your Child's Behavior | |
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| Dealing with School Issues | |
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| Recordkeeping | |
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| Adoption of Tweens and Teens | |
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| Preparing for the Placement | |
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| Knowing When the Honeymoon Is Over | |
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| Unique Challenges for Adolescents | |
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| Bond with Your Adolescent | |
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| Help Your Adolescent Prepare for Independence | |
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| Deal with Peer Pressures | |
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| Recordkeeping | |
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| Adoption of Special Needs Children | |
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| Accept the Realities of Special Needs Children | |
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| Prepare for the Placement | |
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| Dealing with Disabilities | |
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| Emotional Disorders | |
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| Education | |
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| Dealing with Your Emotions | |
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| Helping Family Members Cope | |
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| Helping Your Intellectually or Emotionally Challenged Child | |
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| Finding Support | |
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| Focus on What's Most Important | |
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| Dynamics of Biological and Adoptive Relationships | |
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| Different Types of Adoptions Meet Different Needs | |
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| Dealing with Jealousy | |
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| Dealing with Chance Encounters | |
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| Create a Feeling of Safety | |
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| Questions and Concerns about the Birth Family | |
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| Unlawful Contact from the Birth Family | |
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| Extended Birth Family Visitation Rights | |
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| Separated Siblings | |
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| Emotional Pitfalls for Adopted Children | |
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| Confronting Feelings of Abandonment and Emotional Trauma | |
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| Methods for Changing Behavior | |
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| Dealing with Curiosity and Fantasies | |
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| Acknowledging and Strengthening Connections | |
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| Failed or Disrupted Adoptions | |
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| Being "The Adopted Kid" at School | |
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| Involving Mental Health Professionals | |
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| Answering the Hard Questions | |
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| Strategies for Approaching Questions | |
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| Why Don't I Look Like You? | |
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| Who Are My Real Parents? | |
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| If I'm Really Bad, Will You Give Me Back? | |
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| Why Didn't My Mom Want Me? | |
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| Will I Have Problems Just Like My Birth Mom Did? | |
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| Did You Adopt Me Because You Couldn't Have Your Own Kids? | |
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| The Hard Questions Can Be Answered | |
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| Creating and Strengthening Family Bonds | |
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| Prepare to Build Bonds | |
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| Prepare Your Relatives for Bonding | |
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| Integrating Adopted Children into the Family | |
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| Set Up a Chosen Day and Other Strategies | |
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| Strengthening Your Family's Primary Relationship | |
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| Enhancing Sibling Bonds | |
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| Unique Discipline Issues for Adopted Children | |
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| Hurtful Statements | |
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| Maintain Consistency and Avoid Anger | |
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| Fighting | |
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| Sexual Abuse | |
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| Eating Disorders and Self-Harm | |
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| Important Reassurances | |
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| Searching for Your Adopted Child's Birth Family | |
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| Thinking Through the Search | |
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| When to Search | |
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| Searching | |
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| Preparing Your Child for Contact | |
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| Helping Your Child Deal with Rejection | |
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| When to Give Up | |
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| Helping Adopted Children Become Adults | |
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| Shifting Your Role | |
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| Special Needs Adult Children | |
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| College | |
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| Combating the Effects of Adoption in Adult Life | |
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| Cement Family Bonds Through Traditions | |
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| Weddings | |
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| Grandchildren | |
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| A Final Word on Relating to Adult Children | |
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| Additional Resources | |
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| Organizations, Professionals, and Helpful Web Sites | |
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| Index | |