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| Introduction | |
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| The Geometry of a Healthy Family | |
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| Recognize When You're Caught in a Family Triangle | |
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| Name Your Family's Norms | |
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| You May Be a "Here-and-Now" Kind of Guy, but Your Emotions May Be Caught in the Past | |
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| Sometimes Everyday Relationships Become Familiar | |
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| In a Family Firm, Your Father's Voice May Really Be the CEO's Voice | |
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| Qualify Yourself, so You Stand on Your Own Credentials | |
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| If You Plan to Work in the Family Firm, Get Out of Town | |
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| When You're in the Family Circle, Respect Its Boundaries | |
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| Keep Your Business Out of the Family Party | |
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| Consensus, Consensus, Consensus | |
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| Your Company Will Turn Out to Be a Triangle | |
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| Know Which Hat You Are Wearing: The Business Hat or the Family Hat | |
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| Recognize When You're Being Asked to Respond As a Family Member and When You're Not | |
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| Know What's Inside Your Family Circle | |
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| Know What's Inside Your Business Circle | |
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| Develop Strategies to Keep the Family Firm Accountable | |
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| Business Decisions Need to Be Made for Business Reasons | |
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| The Priorities of the Family and the Priorities of the Business Are Opposites | |
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| Ownership Has Its Privileges, and Its Hazards... | |
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| Ownership in a Family Firm Is a Job Too; Doing It Right Can Mean the Difference Between Disaster and Success | |
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| Before Transmitting Stock, Think It Over Twice: Would I Want This Relative Making Decisions About My Future Livelihood? | |
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| Ownership in a Family Firm Means Learning How to Build Consensus, Consensus, Consensus | |
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| As an Owner, Take the Long View | |
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| The Key to Healthy Ownership of the Family Firm Is the Same As the Key to Any Significant Investment: Information, Information, Information | |
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| If You Build a Family Forum, They Will Come | |
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| Develop Criteria for Future Leadership in Advance | |
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| Each Generation Must Reinvent the Company Through Innovation, Innovation, Innovation | |
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| Competition in the Family Firm: Sibling Rivalry | |
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| Sibling Relationships Are the Longest in Our Lives and Have Great Power Within the Family Firm | |
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| More Than 85 Percent of Family Firms Do Not Survive the Third Generation | |
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| Birth Order Often Defines Sibling Relationships | |
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| Monarchy Was Rejected by the United States, but Not by All Family Firms | |
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| Birth Order Outweighs Gender As a Differentiating Factor in Defining Leadership Styles | |
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| Develop Practical Strategies for Managing Rivalry in the Family Firm | |
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| Preparing Your Daughter to Become CEO | |
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| Messages from You Will Shape Your Daughter's Dreams | |
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| Support the Development of All Her Talents | |
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| Offer Specific Compliments to Reinforce Real Accomplishments | |
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| Encourage Her to Take Risks, According to Her Age and Skills | |
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| Help Her Define Realistic Goals | |
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| Give Your Daughter Equal Air Time | |
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| Ask Her About Her Dreams of Greatness | |
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| Let Her Know That Her Capacity for Empathy and Consensus Building Are Valued Assets | |
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| During the Twentieth Century, Women Have Become a New Species | |
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| The Family Firm Can Become a Lab for "Family-Friendly" Practices | |
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| Partners in Business, Partners in Marriage | |
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| Happily Married Couples Have Separated from Their Families of Origin | |
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| Happily Married Couples Build Both Togetherness and Autonomy | |
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| Happily Married Couples Become Parents | |
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| Happily Married Couples Cope with Crises Together | |
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| Happily Married Couples Make a Safe Place for Resolving Conflict | |
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| Create Time and Space for Sex and Romance | |
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| Happily Married Couples Share Laughter and Common Interests | |
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| Happily Married Couples Create and Re-Create a Positive Emotional Bond | |
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| Preserve a Shared Vision | |
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| Not to Decide Is to Decide: Decision Making in the Family Firm | |
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| Focus on the Not Urgent, but Important | |
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| Develop a Family Forum | |
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| Develop a Family Strategic Plan to Complement the Business Strategic Plan | |
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| Easy Gifts and Easy Hires Can Lead to Hard Times for the Family Firm | |
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| Develop a Family Mission Statement | |
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| Recognize the Power of Your Family's Sayings | |
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| Each Generation Has to Redefine the Family Mission | |
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| Continue to Define Core Values for Children with Great Wealth | |
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| Discuss Together the Possible Elements of a Strategic Family Plan | |
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| Standards of Success in Family Firms | |
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| Write Down a List of Standards Against Which You Evaluate Your Firm | |
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| Develop a Board of Advisors Tailored to Your Family Firm | |
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| The Best Strategy Is to Develop Your Own Strategic Plan | |
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| Family Assets Remain Part of the Balance Sheet in Any Major Decision | |
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| Develop a Method to Measure Family Member Assets | |
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| Build Consensus Together, Based on Your Family Members' Values | |
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| The Process of Building Consensus Can Bring the Family Together | |
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| Sometimes, All the King's Horses and All the King's Men Can't Put the Family Company Together Again | |
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| At the End of Life, Recognize Your Own Capacity for Love and Work, and the Ways Your Family and Your Business Have Enriched Each Other | |
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| References | |
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| Resources for Further Reading | |