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Nice Is Just a Place in France How to Win at Basically Everything

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ISBN-10: 1451687761

ISBN-13: 9781451687767

Edition: 2013

Authors: Betches Staff

List price: $18.99
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Description:

The creators of the popular blog BetchesLoveThis.com use their signature wit and wisdom to teach you how to win in all areas of life—because a Betch always gets what she wants!The BetchesLoveThis blog is wildly popular, with catchphrases and posts repeated all over the Internet. Now, you can laugh out loud while getting answers to life’s greatest questions—from the benefits of dancing on tables to how to get rid of the man who won’t go away—from the straightforward, slightly-mean-spirited-yet-helpful older sister you didn’t know you had.The Betches are here to explain it all—how to combine the hotness of Kate Moss with the wit of Chelsea Handler and the f**k-off vibe of Anna Wintour to become the ultimate Betch. So is this a self-help book, you might wonder? Self-help is for fat people and divorcees.Nice Is Just a Place in Franceis the Betch-in-training bible, addressing the types of problems real girls face in the real world, like, “What do I do if my pot dealer isn’t answering my texts?” and “Is it okay to give head on the first date?” Regardless of what she’ll admit out loud, every girl secretly wants to be a Betch, even the nicest doormat around. So throw away yourCosmoand turn off Oprah, because the Betches are in business!
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Book details

List price: $18.99
Copyright year: 2013
Publisher: Gallery Books
Publication date: 3/12/2013
Binding: Paperback
Pages: 336
Size: 5.25" wide x 8.00" long x 1.00" tall
Weight: 0.836
Language: English

Introduction
Glossary
Lifestyle: How to Live Like a Betch
Talking Shit: Embracing the End of Nicegirls
Abbreviations and Linguistics: The Language of Efficiency and Humor
Diets: Talking Shit Was Never So Topical
Working Out: A Necessary Moral Dilemma
Getting Fucked Up: Yay!
How to Party Like a Betch
Vacations and Summers: It's a Hard-Knock Life
Image: How to Appear Unapproachable and Hot
Appearance: How to Present Yourself in Public without Being Mistaken for a Homeless Woman or Ke$ha
Clothes: How to Dress Like a Slut (the Classy Way)
Status Symbols: What They Say about You
Social Media Image: How to Look Like the Shit on the Internet
The Art of Being Late: How to Show People That Your Time Is More Valuable than Theirs
Appearing Down-to-Earth: How to Fool People into Thinking You're Not Superficial
Not Keeping Up with the News: How to Pretend to Know What's Going On When You Have No Fucking Idea
How to Manipulate Your Parents into Thinking They Raised a Normal Child
Social Life: People Who <strike>You Like</strike> Are Worthy of Your Friendship
The Bestie Group Circle
Guy Friends: A Fairy Tale
How to Text Like You're Kind of a Big Deal
People You Dislike: How to Deal with Them While Not Appearing Psychotic
Enemies: The Objects of Your Animosity
Managing the Outer Circle: Fake Is Better than Nothing
College: Using Higher Education to Get Ahead
Not Doing Work in College: How to Revolve Four Years of Your Life Around Drinking and Hangovers
Studying Abroad: How to Culturally Immerse Yourself in Foreign Alcohol
Spring Break: How to Go Hard without Going <strike>Home</strike> to Jail
College Social Life: How to Keep Friends and Alienate (the Right) People
Greek Life
College Bros: Athletes and Frat Douchebags
Graduation: A Survival Guide
"Career": A Word We Use Loosely
Career Paths: Picking the Least Toxic Poison
How to Apply for a Job Like You Give a Shit
So Now You Have a Job: How to Never Do Work at Work
How to Ask for an Undeserved Raise
Sex: Keep Your Legs Closed and You Too Can Rule the World
Navigating the Bedroom: It's Harder than You Think
Postcoital Conduct: Learning to Take a Hint
Sexting: Getting Fucked in 4G
Birth Control: Manipulating Your Period as if It Were a Man
The Game, Dating, and Love
The Game: Loving Shady Assholes and Hating Nice Guys
Winning the Game: The Scientific Method of Conquering Any Male
Dating: More than Just Free Dinner
The Groupies and How to Get Rid of Them
The Art of Getting to the Second Date
Delusional Dating: The Guide to Dating a Guy Who Doesn't Know It
On the Importance of Being Single
When Love Takes Over
The Long-Distance Relationship: A Recipe for Tears
Manipulating Men
Now That the Love Is Gone: How to Get Over Your Ex
Tying Up the Loose Ends: How to Get Rid of the One Who Won't Go Away
Happily Ever After Requires a Prenup-Getting Engaged
Conclusion: You Can Skip This Part
Acknowledgments