Acknowledgments | p. vii |
Introduction: Intimacy in Relationships | p. 1 |
What are Boundaries? | p. 5 |
Why Boundaries? | p. 7 |
Characteristics of Persons with Healthy Boundaries | p. 23 |
Where We Learn Boundaries | p. 29 |
Developmental Stages | |
Mary Beth's Story | |
The Family System | |
Growing Up in a Functional Family | |
Growing Up in a Dysfunctional Family | |
Dysfunctional Family Roles | |
Dysfunctional Family Rules | |
Summary | |
Consequences of Growing Up in a Dysfunctional Family | p. 43 |
Mike's Story | p. 53 |
Relational Boundaries | p. 57 |
Boundary Violations Against God | |
Boundary Violations Against Self | |
Boundary Violations Against Others | |
Authorities, Subordinates, and Peers | |
Roles in Relationships | |
Spiritual Boundaries | p. 75 |
The Spiritual Impact of All Abuse | |
Kinds of Authorities | |
The God Factor | |
Abusive Religious Systems | |
Abusive Religious Practices | |
Physical Boundaries | p. 89 |
Physical Body Space | |
Invisible, Psychological Space | |
Characteristics of the Abused Child | |
Are You an Abusive Person? | |
Sexual Boundaries | p. 97 |
Kinds of Sexual Violations | |
Aftereffects | |
Are You a Sexaholic? | |
Test Yourself | |
Emotional Boundaries | p. 107 |
Emotional Health and Boundaries | |
Strong Emotional Boundaries | |
Weak Emotional Boundaries | |
The Avoidance of Pain | |
Feelings | |
Thoughts and Feelings | |
How We Violate Emotional Boundaries | |
Being Responsible | |
Models of Unhealthy Boundaries | p. 131 |
Functional and Relational Boundaries | |
Boundaries That Are Too Close | |
Boundaries That Are Too Distant | |
Boundaries That Are Too Close and Too Distant | |
Boundaries That Are Too Rigid | |
Boundaries That Are Too Flexible | |
Boundaries That Are Too Permeable | |
Boundaries That Are Too Impermeable | |
Types of People with Boundary Issues | p. 143 |
Compliants | |
Avoidants | |
Compliant Avoidants | |
Controllers | |
Non-Responsives | |
Controller Non-Responsives | |
Resolving the Losses | p. 155 |
Forgiveness | p. 167 |
Maintenance | p. 177 |
Source Notes | p. 179 |
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