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Foreword | |
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Preface to the Revised Edition | |
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Introduction | |
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20 Things People with Cancer Want You to Know | |
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"It's okay to say or do the 'wrong' thing." | |
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"I need to know you're here for me, but if you can't be, you can still show you care." | |
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"I like to hear success stories, not horror stories." | |
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"I am terrified and need to know you'll forgive me if 1 snap at you or bite your head off." | |
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"I need you to listen to me and let me cry." | |
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"Asking my permission can spare me pain." | |
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"I need to laugh�or just forget about cancer for a while!" | |
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"I need to feel hope, but telling me to think positively can make me feel worse." | |
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"I want you to respect my judgment and treatment decisions." | |
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"I want you to give me an opening to talk about cancer, and then take my lead." | |
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"I want compassion, not pity." | |
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"Advice may not be what I need, and it can hurt more than help. Try comforting me instead." | |
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"I am still me; treat me kindly, not differently." | |
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"If you really want to help me, be specific about your offer, or just help without asking." | |
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"I love being held in your thoughts or prayers." | |
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"Hearing platitudes or what's good about cancer can minimize my feelings." | |
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"I don't know why I got cancer, and hearing your theory may add grave insult to injury." | |
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"Don't take it personally if I don't return your call or want to see you." | |
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"I need you to offer support to my caregiver, because that helps me, too." | |
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"I don't know if I'm cured, and bringing up my health can bring me down." | |
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And one more thing ... | |
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"I am more grateful than I can say for your care, compassion, and support." | |
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A Quick Guide to Cancerquette | |
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The 2010/2011 Survey | |
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Different Kinds of Cancer | |
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Cancer through the Stages | |
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Cancer in Different Circumstances | |
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Cancer at Different Ages | |
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She Wants/He Wants: Cancer and Gender | |
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Cancer and Cultural Background | |
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Other Situations, Complications, and Conditons | |
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The Lists. Do's, Don�ts, Tools, and Treasures | |
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How to Listen | |
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The Cheat Sheet | |
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For Survivors: Hoping and Coping in a World of Uncertainty | |
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Afterword | |
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Acknowledgments | |
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Index | |