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Introduction: Opening Up to the Possibilities: Challenging Monogamy and Revolutionizing Relationships | |
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The Decline of Marriage and Monogamy | |
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Monogamy's Mythology | |
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Nonmonogamy as an Alternative Choice | |
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My Research | |
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Reading Opening Up | |
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Choosing an Open Relationship | |
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Pilots, Parties, and Polyamory: A Brief History | |
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Swinging | |
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Open Marriage | |
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Multilateral Marriage | |
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Gay Bathhouses and Sex Clubs | |
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Lesbian Collectives and Sex Wars | |
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Polyamory | |
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Myths about Nonmonogamy | |
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Is an Open Relationship for You? | |
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Self-evaluation | |
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Why People Choose Open Relationships | |
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What Makes an Open Relationship Work? | |
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Consent | |
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Self-awareness | |
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Communication | |
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Honesty | |
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Boundaries | |
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Trust | |
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Fidelity and Commitment | |
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Styles of Open Relationships | |
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Partnered Nonmonogamy | |
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Definition | |
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Examples | |
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Potential Issues and Conflicts | |
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Swinging | |
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Definition | |
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Beliefs and Attitudes | |
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Swinging Styles | |
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Community | |
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Etiquette | |
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Potential Issues and Conflicts | |
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Polyamory | |
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Definition | |
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Beliefs and Attitudes | |
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Hierarchical Poly | |
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Nonprimary Partners | |
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Nonhierarchical Poly | |
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Nonsexual Poly Relationships | |
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Solo Polyamory | |
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Definition | |
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Potential Issues and Conflicts | |
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Polyfidelity | |
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Definition | |
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Benefits of Polyfidelity | |
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Negotiation and Potential Issues | |
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Monogamous/Nonmonogamous and Mono/Poly Combinations | |
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Definition | |
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Consent and Agreement | |
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Potential Issues and Conflicts | |
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Creating and Sustaining Your Relationships | |
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Designing Your Open Relationship | |
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Drawing the Outline | |
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Filling in the Details | |
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Negotiation | |
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Rules and Agreements | |
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The Myth of Equality | |
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The Relationship Contract | |
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Jealousy and Other Intense Feelings | |
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Jealousy | |
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Envy | |
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Insecurity | |
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Possessiveness | |
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Feeling Excluded | |
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Coping with Jealousy | |
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Fear of Abandonment | |
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Resentment | |
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Compersion | |
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Common Challenges and Problems | |
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New Relationship Energy | |
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Time Management | |
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Miscommunication | |
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Agreement Violation | |
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Seeking Help | |
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Opening Up Again: When Something Changes | |
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A New Desire | |
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A New Orientation | |
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A New Relationship | |
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Falling in Love | |
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From Monogamous to Nonmonogamous | |
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From Nonmonogamous to Monogamous | |
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From Primary To Nonprimary | |
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Coping with Change | |
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Coming Out (or Not), Finding Community, Creating Families | |
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Benefits of Coming Out | |
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Risks of Coming Out | |
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Deciding What's Right for You | |
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Your Coming Out | |
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Finding Community | |
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Families, Tribes, and Networks | |
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Raising Children | |
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Benefits and Risks of Coming Out to Children | |
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What to Consider Before You Tell Them | |
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How to Tell Them | |
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Practical Issues | |
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Safer Sex and Sexual Health | |
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Safer Sex | |
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Sexually Transmitted Infections | |
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Legal and Practical Issues | |
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Housing Laws | |
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Property Ownership | |
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Employment Benefits | |
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Legal Designations and Documents | |
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Children | |
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The Future of Relationships | |
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Appendixes | |
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Notes | |
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Resource Guide | |
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Books | |
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Conferences and Events | |
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GLBT/Queer | |
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Local and Regional Organizations | |
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National Organizations | |
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Online Groups and Lists | |
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Poly-friendly Professionals | |
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Research and Activism | |
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Spirituality | |
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Websites | |
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About the Interviewees | |
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About the Author | |