| |
| |
| Acknowledgments | |
| |
| |
| Introduction: What's Happening to My Life? | |
| |
| |
| My Story | |
| |
| |
| What You Can Expect from This Book | |
| |
| |
| |
| Examining Our Issues | |
| |
| |
| Prompts to Start Planning | |
| |
| |
| Responses from the Group | |
| |
| |
| |
| Organizing Answers and Choosing Discussion Topics | |
| |
| |
| |
| Things I Want to Say but Don't Expect a Response To | |
| |
| |
| |
| Things I Want to Say but Won't, Because It Won't Make a Difference | |
| |
| |
| |
| Things I Want to Say but Should Only Share with a Friend | |
| |
| |
| |
| Things I Really Need to Talk About, Know About, Have Resolved, or Make a Decision About | |
| |
| |
| |
| Communication Tools 101 (or Shall I Say, 9-1-1) | |
| |
| |
| Keep Your Viewpoint While Your Husband and Others Keep Theirs, Yet Still Get What You Want | |
| |
| |
| Change a Person's Behavior, Whether or Not They Change Their Opinion | |
| |
| |
| Changing Your Behavior May Make It Unnecessary for Other People to Change Theirs | |
| |
| |
| Encouraging Your Husband to Say More | |
| |
| |
| Pitfalls to Avoid | |
| |
| |
| Speaking His Language | |
| |
| |
| Summary of Communication Tools | |
| |
| |
| |
| Talk Your Way to Understandings | |
| |
| |
| What If He Refuses to Meet? | |
| |
| |
| What If I Refuse to Meet? | |
| |
| |
| The Setting for Your Discussion | |
| |
| |
| Preparing for the Discussion | |
| |
| |
| The Discussion | |
| |
| |
| Closing the Discussion and Creating Understandings | |
| |
| |
| Sample Understandings | |
| |
| |
| |
| Comprehending Our Emotions-Life in the Guilt Factory | |
| |
| |
| The Big C | |
| |
| |
| Emotional Fine-Line Issues | |
| |
| |
| The Stress of Living Grief | |
| |
| |
| Sometimes Our Emotions Surprise Us | |
| |
| |
| I'm So Tired of Being the "Man"! | |
| |
| |
| Emotions and Words | |
| |
| |
| My Way Versus His Way | |
| |
| |
| Ultimately It Is His Disease | |
| |
| |
| |
| Practical Issues | |
| |
| |
| Practical Fine-Line Issues | |
| |
| |
| |
| Social and Familial issues | |
| |
| |
| Whose Business Is It, Anyway? | |
| |
| |
| Everyone Has an Opinion | |
| |
| |
| The Hottest Button | |
| |
| |
| When Someone Asks | |
| |
| |
| Public Face with Private Pain | |
| |
| |
| Visitors and Privacy | |
| |
| |
| Ceremonies and Services | |
| |
| |
| |
| Self-Care | |
| |
| |
| Manufacture Time | |
| |
| |
| Stop Energy Drains | |
| |
| |
| The Delicate Topics-Love, Sex, Intimacy, and Affairs | |
| |
| |
| Staying Awake When Trauma Becomes Normal | |
| |
| |
| "Sometimes a Cigar Is Just a Cigar" | |
| |
| |
| Health Lessons I Learned from My Husband | |
| |
| |
| |
| 50 Do's and Don'ts | |
| |
| |
| |
| Decisions, Transitions, and Discoveries | |
| |
| |
| Resources | |
| |
| |
| Index | |