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| Introduction | |
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| Who We Are | |
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| How We Got Here | |
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| Our Goal | |
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| What to Expect | |
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| What You Stand to Gain | |
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| Survey the Landscape (And Get Your Bearings) | |
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| Going about Your Business | |
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| "And To Your Left..." | |
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| A Look Back from Us | |
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| Common Features of the Stepmom/Ex-Wife Landscape | |
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| Maxine and Stephanie Duke It Out, from Afar | |
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| What about the Man? | |
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| External Influences | |
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| United by Their Differences | |
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| Extra Reassurance | |
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| Resources to Explore | |
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| As We Leave the Chapter | |
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| Own Your Own Crap (What, Me? A Dark Side?) | |
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| Turning the Flashlight On | |
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| A Look Back from Us | |
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| Disowning Your Relatives | |
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| Top Ten Reasons Not to Even Bother Trying to Get Along with the Stepmom or Ex-Wife | |
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| Shadow Self, Up Close | |
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| What about the Man? | |
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| Dude, Where's My Trophy? | |
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| Emotional Math: Payoffs vs. Costs | |
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| Extra Reassurance | |
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| Resources to Explore | |
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| As We Leave the Chapter | |
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| Imagine the Benefits (Dreams Pull You Forward) | |
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| Lighter but Stronger! | |
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| A Look Back from Us | |
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| A Vital Fuel | |
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| What's in It for Me? | |
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| Two Parallel Realities for Maxine and Stephanie | |
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| Overview of the Specific Benefits | |
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| What about the Man? | |
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| Creating a New Kind of Family Structure | |
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| Stepping Back and Assessing | |
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| Extra Reassurance | |
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| Resources to Explore | |
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| As We Leave the Chapter | |
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| Take Action (Stretching, Inside and Out) | |
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| The Difference between Sitting and Walking | |
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| A Look Back from Us | |
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| Things to Ponder Before You Act | |
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| What about the Man? | |
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| External Actions | |
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| What You're Going to Actually Try | |
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| Stuff to Keep in Mind Beforehand | |
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| Signaling a Sea Change | |
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| Invite Her for Coffee | |
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| Extra Reassurance | |
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| Resources to Explore | |
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| As We Leave the Chapter | |
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| Collaborate (Lighten Your Load-and Hers) | |
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| No Singing, Just Drenched | |
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| A Look Back from Us | |
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| A Closer Look at Collaboration | |
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| Defensiveness | |
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| The Amazing Power of "Just Talking" | |
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| What about the Man? | |
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| Consistent Rules between Houses | |
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| Extra Reassurance | |
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| Resources to Explore | |
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| As We Leave the Chapter | |
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| Be Accountable (No One Else to Blame) | |
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| Stay in Your Room! | |
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| A Look Back from Us | |
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| A Definition | |
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| The Benefits of Being Accountable | |
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| What Accountability Looks Like in Action | |
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| Some Additional Challenges to Practicing Accountability | |
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| What about the Man? | |
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| Extra Reassurance | |
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| Resources to Explore | |
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| As We Leave the Chapter | |
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| Communicate (Or, Why Aren't You a Mind Reader?) | |
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| On the One Hand | |
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| A Look Back from Us | |
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| Communication 101 | |
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| Consequences of Poor Communication | |
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| What about the Man? | |
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| Harnessing Good Communication to Increase Two-Family Harmony | |
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| Family Meetings | |
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| Extra Reassurance | |
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| Resources to Explore | |
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| As We Leave the Chapter | |
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| Regroup (Dust Off Your Pants When You Fall Down) | |
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| A Pile of Fire Extinguishers | |
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| A Look Back from Us | |
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| How Many Kinds of Conflict? Let Me Count the Ways | |
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| Help for in the Moment | |
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| Help You Can Use Later | |
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| What about the Man? | |
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| Other Ideas to Try | |
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| Extra Reassurance | |
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| Resources to Explore | |
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| As We Leave the Chapter | |
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| Strengthen (Bringing out the Best in the Kids) | |
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| A Common Horizon | |
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| A Look Back from Us | |
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| What Might Stand in the Way | |
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| What about the Man? | |
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| Why Do This? | |
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| Examine What They Need | |
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| Figure Out How to Make It Happen | |
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| One Last Motivator | |
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| Extra Reassurance | |
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| Resources to Explore | |
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| As We Leave the Chapter | |
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| Celebrate and Acknowledge (Anytime is Springtime) | |
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| Shaking Hands over the Fence | |
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| A Look Back from Us | |
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| How Far You've Come | |
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| What about the Man? | |
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| Putting Current Problems in Perspective | |
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| Look for More Ways to Bond and Connect | |
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| Extra Reassurance | |
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| Resources to Explore | |
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| As We Leave the Chapter (and the Book) | |
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| Index | |
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| Acknowledgments | |
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| About the Authors | |
