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| The Darwin Awards: What are they? | |
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| Survival of the Fittest | |
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| Rules and Eligibility | |
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| Charles Darwin's Theory of Evolution | |
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| Uncommon Common Sense | |
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| History and Internet Culture | |
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| Advice on Reading the Stories | |
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| Natural Selection: Animal Misadventures | |
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| Can Animals Win Darwin Awards? | |
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| Darwin Award: In a Pig's Eye | |
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| Darwin Award: Killer Whale Rodeo | |
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| Darwin Award: Playing with Cats | |
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| Darwin Award: Hungry Python Kills Owner | |
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| Darwin Award: Poisonous Pets | |
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| Darwin Award: Snake Charmer? | |
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| Darwin Award: Burmese Python | |
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| Darwin Award: What's New, Pussycat? | |
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| Darwin Award: Wild Animal Lesson | |
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| Darwin Award: Smarter Animals | |
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| Darwin Award: Running of the Bulls | |
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| Darwin Award: Silenced by the Lambs | |
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| Darwin Award: Human Hitching Post | |
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| Honorable Mention: Nine Times a Loser | |
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| Honorable Mention: Revenge of the Gopher | |
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| Honorable Mention: Woman Disarmed by Tiger | |
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| Honorable Mention: Don't Mess with Mama Bear | |
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| Urban Legend: Man Glued to Rhino Buttocks | |
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| Personal Account: Bug Repellent | |
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| Personal Account: Why Kids Leave the Farm | |
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| Relatively Dangerous: A Family Affair | |
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| Children and Evolution | |
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| Darwin Award: Go, Speed Racer, Go | |
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| Darwin Award: Wife Tossing in Buenos Aires | |
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| Darwin Award: Count Your Chickens | |
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| Darwin Award: Father Knows Best | |
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| Darwin Award: Laughing Gas | |
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| Darwin Award: Murderous Affair | |
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| Darwin Award: Avoiding a Fight | |
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| Darwin Award: Maine Chainsaw Romance | |
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| Honorable Mention: Trash Compactor | |
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| Honorable Mention: Darwin Your Bratty Kids | |
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| Urban Legend: Missionary Miscalculation | |
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| Personal Account: Accidental Safe Sex | |
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| Personal Account: Wives with Chloroform | |
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| "I Fought the Law ...": Stupid Criminal Tricks | |
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| If Evolution Works, Why So Many Idiots? | |
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| Darwin Award: Junk Food Junkie | |
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| Darwin Award: Copper Caper | |
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| Darwin Award: Good Trumps Evil at Church | |
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| Darwin Award: Jumping Jack Cash | |
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| Darwin Award: Tired of It All | |
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| Darwin Award: Modus Operandi Misfires | |
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| Darwin Award: Restaurant Thief | |
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| Darwin Award: Dum Dum Boutique | |
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| Darwin Award: Scrap Metal Thieves | |
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| Darwin Award: Wrong Time, Wrong Place | |
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| Darwin Award: Clumsy Canadian Burglar | |
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| Darwin Award: Escaping Conviction | |
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| Darwin Award: Rob Your Neighbor | |
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| Honorable Mention: Pick Your Target | |
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| Honorable Mention: Armed and Dangerous? | |
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| Honorable Mention: Poor Sense of Direction | |
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| Honorable Mention: Airbag Weapons | |
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| Honorable Mention: Mis-Steak | |
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| Honorable Mention: Wile E. Coyote of Burglars | |
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| Honorable Mention: Limo and Latte Burglar | |
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| Honorable Mention: Spare Some Change? | |
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| Honorable Mention: Three Times a Loser | |
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| Honorable Mention: Sunny Side Up | |
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| Honorable Mention: Official Drug Test | |
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| Honorable Mention: Klutzy Crook | |
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| Personal Account: Compacted Ignorance | |
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| Personal Account: Gangster Blues | |
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| Up in Smoke: Fire and Explosions | |
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| Awards for Priests and Gays? | |
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| Darwin Award: Living on Zionist Time | |
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| Darwin Award: Firefighters Ignite! | |
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| Darwin Award: Igniting Fireworks the Easy Way | |
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| Darwin Award: Justice Is Served | |
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| Darwin Award: No Smoking? Ha! | |
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| Darwin Award: Dynamite and Boats Don't Mix | |
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| Darwin Award: Up in Smoke | |
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| Darwin Award: Cigarette Lighter Triggers Fatal Explosion | |
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| Darwin Award: Lights Out | |
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| Honorable Mention: Chimney Safety | |
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| Honorable Mention: I Just Flicked My Bic! | |
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| Urban Legend: Scuba Divers and Forest Fires | |
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| Urban Legend: Cow Bomb | |
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| Urban Legend: Raccoon Rocket | |
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| Urban Legend: Hydrogen Beer Disaster | |
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| Urban Legend: Cell Phone Destroys Gas Station | |
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| Personal Account: Elemental Mistake | |
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| Personal Account: Is It Loaded? | |
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| Personal Account: Final Flick of Bic | |
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| Leaps of Faith: Fatal Falls | |
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| John F. Kennedy Jr. | |
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| Darwin Award: Don't Drink and Fly | |
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| Darwin Award: Lawyer Aloft | |
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| Darwin Award: Stoned Sleep | |
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| Darwin Award: Homegrown Parachute | |
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| Darwin Award: Yosemite Parachute Safety | |
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| Darwin Award: Shocking Fall | |
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| Darwin Award: Bungee Jumper | |
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| Darwin Award: Bridge Bonzai | |
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| Darwin Award: One for the Birds | |
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| Personal Account: Leap of Faith | |
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| Personal Account: One, Two, Three, Heave! | |
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| Urban Legend: Misadventure at the Metallica Concert | |
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| Urban Legend: Power Plant Fitness Freak | |
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| Personal Account: Leveled | |
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| Military Intelligence: Uninformed Men | |
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| Historical Darwin Awards | |
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| Darwin Award: Intelligence Blunders | |
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| Darwin Award: Hanging Around Jail | |
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| Darwin Award: Peeper Plummets | |
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| Darwin Award: Dead Spitter | |
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| Darwin Award: New Dating Technique | |
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| Darwin Award: Resistance Is Futile | |
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| Darwin Award: Wait for Me! | |
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| Personal Account: Industrious Brain-Dead Private | |
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| Personal Account: 5 Soldiers, 6 Police, 0 Brains | |
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| Personal Account: Jet Ski Jock | |
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| Personal Account: North Pacific Deckpecker | |
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| Personal Account: Flack Vest Testing | |
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| Testosterone Poisoning: Macho Men | |
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| The Issue of Offspring | |
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| Darwin Award: JATO | |
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| Darwin Award: Fatal Footsie | |
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| Darwin Award: Guy Gulps Goldfish | |
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| Darwin Award: Dry Spell | |
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| Darwin Award: Sequined Pastie | |
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| Darwin Award: Gun Safety Training | |
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| Darwin Award: The Winner Gets ... A Postmortem | |
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| Darwin Award: I'm a Man, I Can Handle It | |
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| Darwin Award: William Tell Overture | |
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| Darwin Award: Sink the Cue Ball | |
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| Darwin Award: Repairs on the Road | |
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| Honorable Mention: Right Tool for the Right Job | |
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| Honorable Mention: Kiss Bites Back | |
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| Urban Legend: The Dog and the Jeep | |
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| Personal Account: One Cool Dude | |
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| Personal Account: Out of Their Heads | |
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| Personal Account: Round Lake Shortcut | |
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| Darwin Award: Chute Boy | |
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| Dangerous Liaisons: Unsafe Sex | |
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| Evolutionary Hall of Shame | |
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| Darwin Award: Love Crushed Sex | |
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| Darwin Award: Baby, You Drive Me Crazy | |
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| Darwin Award: Sex and Suffocation | |
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| Darwin Award: Fatal Flasher | |
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| Honorable Mention: Chimney Manners | |
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| Honorable Mention: Betrayal of Trussed | |
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| Urban Legend: Lightning Date | |
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| Urban Legend: Gerbil Rocket | |
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| Urban Legend: Hedonist Air Pumpers | |
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| Urban Legend: Romeo and Juliet? | |
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| Davey Jones' Locker: Watery Demise | |
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| Divergent Evolution | |
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| Darwin Award: Hurricane Hangover | |
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| Darwin Award: Gone Fishin' | |
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| Darwin Award: Polar Bear Swim | |
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| Darwin Award: Crappy Driving Award | |
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| Darwin Award: Can Duck Shooters Swim? | |
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| Darwin Award: Yosemite Hike | |
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| Darwin Award: Wet Will He | |
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| Darwin Award: Hard Work Rewards | |
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| Honorable Mention: Loch Ness Monster | |
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| Urban Legend: Darwin Beach Death | |
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| Personal Account: Quarry Story | |
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| Personal Account: The Iceman Exiteth | |
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| Personal Account: Rub Dub Dub, Men in a Tub | |
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| Personal Account: Surprise Flush | |
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| Personal Account: Tide-ally Impaired | |
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| Man's Favorite Toy: Penis Envy | |
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| Losing the Family Jewels | |
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| Honorable Mention: Zany New Zealand Contest | |
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| Honorable Mention: Mr. Happy's Vacuum | |
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| Darwin Award: Priapism Takes a Penis | |
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| Darwin Award: Man Slices Off Penis | |
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| Darwin Award: Love from the Heart | |
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| Honorable Mention: Scoutmaster Snare | |
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| Honorable Mention: Scrotum Self-Repair | |
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| Honorable Mention: Horse Drug Experiment | |
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| Urban Legend: Frog Giggin' Accident in Arkansas | |
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| Personal Account: Jump Rope Blues | |
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| Personal Account: Disco Dork | |
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| Personal Account: Bridge Bowling | |
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| Personal Account: Pissing into the Wind | |
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| Foolish Ingenuity: End of the Line | |
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| Evolution in Action | |
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| Honorable Mention: Lawnchair Larry | |
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| Darwin Award: The Last Supper | |
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| Darwin Award: Ultimate Price for Smelling Nice | |
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| Darwin Award: Midnight Special | |
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| Darwin Award: Deadly Reading Habits | |
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| Darwin Award: Breatharianism | |
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| Darwin Award: Roller Coaster | |
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| Darwin Award: Mental Eclipse | |
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| Darwin Award: No Bike Lane at the Airport | |
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| Darwin Award: The Bumbershoot | |
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| Darwin Award: Lemmings in a Well | |
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| Darwin Award: Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow | |
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| Darwin Award: Death of Dracula | |
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| Darwin Award: The Daily Grind | |
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| Urban Legend: Christmas Roast | |
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| Urban Legend: The Laundry Was Clean ... | |
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| Urban Legend: Unfortunate Husband | |
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| Urban Legend: Overkill | |
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| Personal Account: Team Spirit | |
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| Personal Account: Cleaning the Head | |
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| Appendices | |
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| Website Biography | |
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| Darwin Haiku | |
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| Author Biography | |
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| Story Index | |