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A Note on Texts and Sources | |
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Introduction: True Stories, Too Good to Be True | |
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Jumping to Conclusions | |
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"The Brain Drain" | |
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"The Solid Cement Cadillac" | |
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"The Package of Cookies" | |
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"The Tube on the Tube" | |
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"The Surpriser Surprised" | |
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"Why I Fired My Secretary" | |
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"The Engaged Couple" | |
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"The Fart in the Dark" | |
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"The Hairdresser's Error" | |
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"The Stolen Wallet" | |
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"The Mexican Pet" | |
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"The Hare Dryer" | |
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As told by Johnny Carson | |
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As told by Michael Landon to Johnny Carson | |
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"The Air-Freighted Pet" | |
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As told by Paul Harvey | |
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"The Poisoned Pussycat at the Party" | |
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"The Bug under the Rug" | |
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As told by Alex Thien | |
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Classic Dog Tales | |
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"The Choking Doberman" | |
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"The Swiss Charred Poodle" | |
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"Not My Dog" | |
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"The Licked Hand" | |
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"The Crushed Dog" | |
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"The Dog in the High-Rise" | |
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As told by Truman Capote to Lawrence Grobel | |
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"Fifi Spills the Paint," aka "Kitty Takes the Rap" | |
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"Take the Puppy and Run" | |
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Just Deserts | |
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"The Loaded Dog" | |
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"The Plant's Revenge" | |
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"The Dead Cat in the Package" | |
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"The Runaway Grandmother" | |
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"The $50 Porsche" | |
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"Dial R-E-V-E-N-G-E" | |
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"Revenge of the Rich" | |
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As told by Paul Harvey | |
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"Gag Me with a Siphon" | |
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"The Stolen Specimen" | |
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"The Videotaped Theft" | |
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"Urban Pancake" | |
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"The Will" | |
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"Promiscuity Rewarded" | |
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Automania | |
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"The Hook" | |
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"The Severed Fingers" | |
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"Decapitated Drivers and Riders" | |
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"The Killer in the Back Seat" | |
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As told on Late Night with David Letterman | |
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"The Hairy-Armed Hitchhiker" | |
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"The Boyfriend's Death" | |
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"The Slasher under the Car" | |
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"The Elephant That Sat on the VW" | |
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"The Arrest" | |
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"The Body on the Car" | |
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"The Wife Left Behind" | |
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"The Baby on the Roof" | |
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"The Nut and the Tire Nuts" | |
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"The Pig on the Road" | |
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"Let's Give Toll Takers a Hand" | |
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"The Bargain Sports Car" | |
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Sexcapades | |
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"The Stuck Couple" | |
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"Stick-Shift Frenzy" | |
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"The Bothered Bride" and "The Grumbling Groom" | |
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"Filmed in the Act" | |
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"Superhero Hijinks" | |
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"Sex in Disguise" | |
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"AIDS Mary" and "AIDS Harry" | |
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Losing Face | |
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"The Unzipped Plumber (or Mechanic)" | |
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"The Unzipped Fly" | |
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"The Golf Bag" | |
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"The Unlucky Contacts" | |
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"The Wrong Teeth" | |
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"Bungling Brides" | |
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"The Nude Bachelor" | |
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"Come and Get It!" | |
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"A License to Practice" | |
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"The Witness's Note" | |
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"The Blind Date" | |
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"Buying Tampax" | |
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Accidents Will Happen | |
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"Give Me a High Three" | |
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"The Lawn Mower Accident" | |
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"The Ski Accident" | |
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"The Barrel of Bricks" | |
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"Up a Tree" | |
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"The Last Kiss" | |
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"The Death of Little Mikey" | |
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Creepy Contaminations | |
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"The Kentucky Fried Rat" | |
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"The Mouse in the Coke" | |
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"Alligators in the Sewers" | |
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"The Snake in the Store" | |
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"A Bug in the Ear" | |
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"Spiders in the Hairdo" | |
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"The Spider Bite" | |
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"Spider Eggs in Bubble Yum" | |
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"The Spider in the Cactus" | |
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"The Poison Dress" | |
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"The Corpse in the Cask" | |
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"The Accidental Cannibals" | |
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"Hold the Mayo! Hold the Mozzarella!" | |
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Sick Humor | |
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"The Kafkaesque Hospital Visit" | |
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"Dental Death" | |
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"The Relative's Cadaver" | |
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"Gerbilling" | |
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"Scrotum Self-Repair" | |
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"Superglue Revenge" | |
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"The Runaway Patient" | |
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Bringing Up Baby | |
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"The Hippie Baby-Sitter" | |
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"The Baby-Sitter and the Man Upstairs" | |
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"Baby's Stuck at Home Alone" | |
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"The Inept Mother" | |
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"The Stuffed Baby" | |
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Strange Things Happen | |
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"The Vanishing Hitchhiker" | |
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"The Lost Wreck" | |
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"The Death Car" | |
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"The Missing Day in Time" | |
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"The Ghost in Search of Help" | |
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"The Well to Hell" | |
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"The Ghostly Videotape" | |
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"A Dirt-Cheap Way to Sell Real Estate" | |
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"The Devil in the Disco" | |
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Funny Business | |
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"The Bedbug Letter" | |
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"Red Velvet Cake" | |
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"Neiman Marcus Cookies" | |
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"Find the Hat" | |
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"The Wife on the Flight" | |
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"Redemption Rumors" | |
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"The Body in the Bed" | |
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"The Cabbage Patch Tragedy" | |
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The World of Work | |
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"The Rattle in the Cadillac" | |
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"The Roughneck's Revenge" | |
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"Fixing the Flue" | |
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"The Locked-Out Pilot" | |
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"Language Boners: The Folklore of Paperwork" | |
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"The Wordy Government Memo" | |
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Baffled by Technology | |
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"The Microwaved Pet" | |
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"The Technology Contest" | |
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"Curses! Broiled Again!" | |
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"Push-Starting the Car" | |
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"Cruise Control" | |
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"The Ice-Cream Car" | |
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The Criminal Mind | |
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"The Colander Copier Caper" | |
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"A Friend of the Family" | |
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"The Two Hitchhikers" | |
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"The Double Theft" | |
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"The Robber Who Was Hurt" | |
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"A Double-Whammy Theft Legend" | |
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As told by Jack Paar | |
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"The Grocery Scam" | |
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"The Shoplifter's Hat" | |
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"Indecent Exposure" | |
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"The Attempted Abduction" | |
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"The Unstealable Car" | |
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"Stripping the Car" | |
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"Get Out of Here!" | |
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Human Nature | |
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"The Baby Train" | |
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"The Trained Professor" | |
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"Cussing and Clowns" | |
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"Take My Tickets, Please!" | |
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"The Dishonest Note" | |
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"Pass It On" | |
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"The Lottery Ticket" | |
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"Dial 911 for Help" | |
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Strays from the Wild Kingdom | |
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"The Kangaroo Thief" | |
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"The Deer Departed" | |
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"Horsing Around" | |
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"The Hapless Water Skier" | |
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"The Giant Catfish" | |
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"The Flying Cow" | |
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"The Fatal Boot" | |
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"Snakes in the Amusement Park" | |
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"The Snake in the Stawberry Patch" | |
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Pet Problems | |
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"The Bump in the Rug" | |
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"The Pet Nabber" | |
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"The Flying Kitten" | |
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"The Missionaries and the Cat" | |
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"The Bungled Rescue of the Cat" | |
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"The Eaten Pets" | |
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"The Pet and the Naked Man" | |
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Slapstick Comedy | |
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"The Exploding Toilet" | |
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"Stuck on the Toilet" | |
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"The Man on the Roof" | |
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"The Exploding Bra" | |
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"The Nude Housewife" | |
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"The Nude in the RV" | |
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"The Stunned Deer--or Deer Stunt" | |
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Bogus Warnings | |
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"Blue Star Acid" | |
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"Lights Out!" | |
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"The Good Times Virus" | |
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"The Kidney Heist" | |
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"The Welded Contacts" | |
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"The Procter and Gamble Trademark" | |
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"The Madalyn Murray O'Hair Petition" | |
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"The Veterans' Insurance Dividend" | |
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Mistaken Identifications | |
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"The Elevator Incident" | |
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"It All Started with Neil (Or Did It?)" | |
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"Sit, Whitey!" | |
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"Black and White" | |
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"The Ice-Cream-Cone Caper" | |
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As told by Paul Harvey | |
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"The Blind Man" | |
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Campus Capers | |
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"The Dormitory Surprise" | |
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"The Gay Roommate" | |
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"The Roommate's Death" | |
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"Switched Campus Buildings" | |
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"Sinking Libraries" | |
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"The Acrobatic Professor" | |
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"The Telltale Report" | |
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"The Daughter's Letter from College" | |
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"The Barometer Problem" | |
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"Term Paper Trickery" | |
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"The Bird Foot Exam" | |
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"Do You Know Who I Am?" | |
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"Tricky Q and A" | |
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"The Second Blue Book" | |
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"True" Urban Legends | |
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"The Pregnant Shoplifter" | |
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"The Unsolvable Math Problem" | |
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"The Heel in the Grate" | |
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"Craig's World-Record Collection" | |
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"Green Stamps" | |
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"The Bullet Baby" | |
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Epilogue: Urban Legend Parodies | |