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| Acknowledgments | |
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| Introduction: From Telling to Sharing: Changes in Adoption Practice | |
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| Adoption and the World of the Parent | |
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| Adoption Research | |
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| Adoption and the World of the Young Child | |
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| Stories of Parents and Children Talking Together about Adoption | |
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| Teddy and Anna | |
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| Teddy: I don't want [my birthfather] to find me. He'd take me away. He'd change his mind. | |
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| Anna: You know, [in adoption] somebody wins and somebody loses. | |
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| Laura and Maya | |
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| Laura: Mommy, you're not really really my mommy, are you? | |
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| Maya: Let's call [my birthmom] Forsythia. | |
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| Jeff and Melissa | |
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| Jeff: Why didn't my real mom want me? ... I think she didn't like me. | |
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| Melissa: I was always wanted. My parents who adopted me wanted me even before I was born. | |
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| Ian and Elizabeth | |
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| Ian: How fast did you go, Mommy, to get me in the car? | |
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| Elizabeth: Then I was in Daddy's tummy! | |
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| Mehera | |
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| Mehera: Adopting means you love a baby very much and go find her. | |
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| Kathy and Aaron | |
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| Kathy: Who is right, Mom, my birthmom or Jane [who will keeps her baby]? | |
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| Aaron: It's okay, Mom. You have me now. | |
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| Daniel Joo Bin: Family Lost and Found | |
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| Daniel: You're Oma. That means "Mother" in Korean. | |
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| Virginia and Jonathan | |
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| Virginia: Mom, why would a lady who grew a baby give the baby away? | |
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| Jonathan: I so sad I didn't grow in your uterus, Mommy. | |
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| Nora | |
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| Nora: Some kids have lots of mothers. | |
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| Max and Lani: Twins in an Open Adoption | |
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| Max: Okay, Sis, first I'll marry our friend; then I'll marry you, and one can be the birthmom and one can be the adopted mom. | |
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| Lani: I wish I had been in your womb. | |
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| Paul and Steven | |
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| Paul: Joey is lucky because his mom is three things - his mom, his birthmother, and his teacher. Why can't you be three things? | |
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| Steven: When will I ever see my sister again? | |
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| Margaret and William: Adoption as "No Big Deal" | |
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| A Birth and Adoptive Father | |
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| Richard: Where the kid came from seems sort of bookish, abstract. | |
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| Afterword | |
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| Appendix A: Two Families Who Decided Not to Talk with Their Young Children about Adoption | |
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| Eric: One-Time Telling | |
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| Jeremy and Chloe: Deciding to Postpone Telling until Latency | |
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| Appendix B: Adoptive Comments, Questions, and Play Sequences of Adopted Children in the Stories, Arranged by Age | |
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| References | |
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| Index | |