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| Acknowledgments | |
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| Children of the Night | |
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| Who Are These Emotional Vampires? | |
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| Are They Really Vampires? | |
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| Antisocial Vampires | |
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| Histrionic Vampires | |
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| Narcissistic Vampires | |
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| Obsessive-Compulsive Vampires | |
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| Paranoid Vampires | |
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| Maturity and Mental Health | |
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| If Emotional Vampires Are Children, What Does It Take to Be a Grown-Up? | |
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| What Causes People to Become Emotional Vampires? | |
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| Immaturity Versus Evil | |
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| The Everybody and Nobody Rule | |
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| What If You See Yourself? | |
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| The Way of Vampires | |
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| How Emotional Vampires Are Different from and More Dangerous than Other Annoying People | |
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| Vampires Are Different | |
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| Vampires Prey on Humans | |
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| Vampires Can't See Themselves in a Mirror | |
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| Vampires Are More Powerful in the Dark | |
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| Protecting Yourself from Vampires | |
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| Lovable Rogues | |
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| The Antisocial Types | |
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| The Ferrari-Toyota Dilemma | |
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| How to Recognize an Antisocial Vampire | |
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| The Antisocial Emotional Vampire Checklist: Listening to the Call of the Wild | |
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| What the Questions Measure | |
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| Vampire Daredevils | |
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| Sexy, Thrilling, and Definitely Bad for Your Health | |
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| The Physiology of Excitement | |
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| Daredevil Hypnosis | |
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| Female Daredevils | |
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| How Vampires Keep You Coming Back for More | |
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| 10 Ways to Protect Yourself from Daredevils | |
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| Daredevils in Your Life | |
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| Daredevil Lovers and Spouses | |
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| The Action Hero | |
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| The Liar | |
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| The Unfaithful Lover | |
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| Daredevil Ex-Husband | |
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| Daredevil Dads | |
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| Daredevil Adult Children | |
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| Antisocial Used Car Salesmen | |
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| Slicker than Cheap Polyester, So Always Remember to Read the Fine Print | |
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| Used Car Hypnosis | |
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| Is Honesty Really the Best Policy? | |
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| Vampire Bullies | |
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| Big, Scary, Powerful, and Stupid as the Guys Who Used to Take Lunch Money | |
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| The Instinct for Aggression | |
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| Vampire Bully Hypnosis | |
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| What to Do About Bullies | |
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| How to Do the Unexpected | |
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| Antisocial Used Car Salesmen and Bullies in Your Life | |
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| Living with a Liar | |
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| Bullies in Your Life | |
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| Living in a Minefield | |
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| Therapy for Antisocial Vampires | |
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| The Goal | |
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| Anger Control Treatment | |
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| Treatment for Addiction | |
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| Self-Help | |
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| What Will Hurt | |
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| Show Business, Vampire Style | |
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| The Histrionic Types | |
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| What It's Like to Be Histrionic | |
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| The Histrionic Dilemma | |
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| What the Questions Measure | |
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| The Histrionic Vampire Checklist: Living a Soap Opera | |
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| How to Protect Yourself from Histrionic Vampires | |
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| Vampires Who Ham It Up | |
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| Whether It's Sex, Sickness, or Secrets of Success, There's Only One Show Business | |
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| Ham-It-Up Hypnosis | |
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| Writing a Safe Role for Yourself | |
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| Illness as Theater | |
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| Celebrities, Fans, and Wannabes | |
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| Nine Ways to Protect Yourself from Histrionic Hams | |
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| Passive-Aggressive Vampires | |
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| Deliver Us from Ghoulies and Ghosties and People Who Are Only Trying to Help | |
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| Giving Until It Hurts | |
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| Illness as Communication | |
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| Passive-Aggressive Hypnosis | |
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| The High-Self-Esteem Syndrome | |
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| Nine Ways to Protect Yourself from Passive-Aggressive Histrionics | |
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| Histrionics in Your Life | |
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| Histrionic Martial Arts | |
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| My Mother, the Drama Queen | |
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| The Queen of Gossip | |
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| Your Depressed Sister | |
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| Male Histrionics | |
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| Therapy for Histrionic Vampires | |
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| The Goal | |
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| Professional Help | |
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| Self-Help | |
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| What Will Hurt | |
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| Big Egos, Small Everywhere Else | |
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| The Narcissistic Types | |
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| What It's Like to Be Narcissistic | |
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| The Narcissistic Dilemma | |
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| Narcissism and Self-Esteem | |
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| What the Questions Measure | |
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| The Narcissistic Vampire Checklist: Identifying the Self-Styled Smartest, Most Talented, All-Around Best People in the World | |
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| Vampires Who Are Legends in Their Own Minds | |
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| With Talent Like Theirs, Who Needs Performance? | |
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| How Narcissistic Legends Prevent Themselves from Succeeding | |
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| Narcissistic Legend Hypnosis | |
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| How to Socialize Narcissistic Legends | |
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| Nine Ways to Protect Yourself from Narcissistic Legends in Their Own Minds | |
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| Vampire Superstars | |
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| You've Got to Love These Guys! Worship Them, Actually | |
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| Dealing with Superstars' Insatiable Needs | |
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| Superstar Hypnosis | |
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| Sex and the Superstar | |
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| Superstar Depression and Anger | |
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| Nine Ways to Protect Yourself from Narcissistic Superstars | |
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| Narcissists in Your Life | |
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| Pundits from Hell | |
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| Tiger Mom | |
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| Season's Greetings from the Narcissist in Your Life | |
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| Therapy for Narcissistic Vampires | |
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| The Goal | |
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| Professional Help | |
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| Self-Help | |
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| What Will Hurt | |
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| Too Much of a Good Thing | |
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| The Obsessive-Compulsive Types | |
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| What It's Like to Be Obsessive-Compulsive | |
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| How Much Is Too Much? | |
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| Punishment, Where Good and Evil Meet | |
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| What the Questions Measure | |
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| The Obsessive-Compulsive Vampire Checklist: Vice Masquerading as Virtue | |
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| The Obsessive-Compulsive Dilemma | |
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| Vampire Perfectionists and Puritans | |
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| Can the Undead Be Anal-Retentive? | |
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| Why Do They Always Seem Angry? | |
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| Obsessive-Compulsive Hypnosis | |
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| Product Versus Process | |
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| Demanding Priorities | |
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| Perfectionists How the Imperfect Can Deal with Perfectionists | |
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| Puritans | |
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| Meet Your Inner Teenager | |
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| Nine Ways to Protect Yourself from Obsessive-Compulsives: What to Do When the Good Guys Are After You | |
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| Obsessive-Compulsives in Your Life | |
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| Control Freak | |
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| Control Freak Parents | |
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| Married to a Control Freak | |
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| Therapy for Obsessive-Compulsive Vampires | |
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| The Goal | |
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| Professional Help | |
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| What Will Hurt | |
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| Seeing Things That Others Can't | |
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| The Paranoid Types | |
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| Paranoid Purity | |
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| What It's Like to Be Paranoid | |
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| The Paranoid Emotional Vampire Checklist: Next Stop, the Twilight Zone | |
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| What the Questions Measure | |
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| Vampire Visionaries and Green-Eyed Monsters | |
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| Inspiration Always Involves Blowing Things out of Proportion | |
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| The Paranoid Quest | |
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| Paranoid Hypnosis | |
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| Visionaries | |
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| How to Recognize Crazy Ideas | |
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| Paranoids and Religion | |
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| Green-Eyed Monsters | |
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| The Nine Elements of Vampire-Fighting Strategy: How to Give Paranoids a Glimpse of Reality | |
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| Therapy for Paranoid Vampires | |
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| The Goal | |
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| Professional Help | |
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| Self-Help | |
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| What Will Hurt | |
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| Sunrise at Dracula's Castle | |
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| Index | |