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Preface | |
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Acknowledgments | |
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How Young Children Understand Illness | |
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Infancy and Toddler Years | |
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Preschool Children (Ages Three to Six) | |
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Elementary School Years (Ages Seven to Twelve) | |
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How Older Children Understand Illness | |
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Adolescence | |
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Late Adolescence and Early Adulthood | |
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New Diagnosis: Organizing Your Support System | |
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Gather Medical Information | |
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Use Familiar Caregivers and Routines | |
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Ask Your Child's Friends' Parents to Help | |
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Designate a "Minister of Information" | |
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Designate a "Captain of Kindness" | |
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Delegate Mundane Tasks | |
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Help Your Helpers with Schedules, Lists, and Labels | |
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Ask Older Children What They Need Help With | |
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Take One Day at a Time | |
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Maintaining a Child's Daily Schedule and Family Routine | |
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Reestablishing Normalcy | |
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Your Child's Daily Schedule | |
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Your Family Routine | |
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When Your Child Wants to Be Everywhere but Home | |
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Parents Living in Different Households | |
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Sharing Your Home | |
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Different Children, Different Families, Different Needs | |
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Communicating with Your Child About the Illness | |
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Everyone Deserves to Know What Is Going On | |
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Talking About a New Diagnosis or a Change in Your Medical Condition | |
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Welcome and Explore Your Child's Questions | |
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Communication in Multicultural Households | |
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How to Help Other Adults Talk with Your Child About the Illness | |
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If Your Child Asks, "Are You Going to Die?" | |
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Religious and Spiritual Beliefs | |
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What Does My Child Really Want to Know? | |
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If Your Progress Is Uncertain | |
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If It Is Likely That You Will Die Within the Next Few Weeks | |
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Guiding Principles | |
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Different Childhood Coping Styles | |
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Easy and Difficult Temperaments | |
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Knowing Temperamental Style Helps Parents Anticipate and Plan | |
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You Are Already the Expert on Your Child | |
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Let Your Child Know You Notice Things That Are Hard for Him or Her | |
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Four Types of Children Who Worry Parents Most | |
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The Bottom Line | |
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How Your Symptoms Affect Your Children | |
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Fatigue | |
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Pain | |
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Concentration Problems and Memory Loss | |
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Difficulty Expressing Yourself | |
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Changes in Appearance | |
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Lowered Immunity | |
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Difficulty Controlling Anger | |
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Dealing with Other Symptoms | |
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Helping the School Support Your Child | |
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Pick a Point Person | |
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Keep the Focus on the Child | |
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Check in with Your Child About School Events | |
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Adjust Expectations for Schoolwork When Necessary | |
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Find Out About Your Child's Curriculum | |
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Hospital Visits | |
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Prepare in Advance | |
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During the Visit | |
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After the Visit | |
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Times When Visits Are Best Avoided | |
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When a Child Doesn't Want to Visit | |
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Alternatives to a Visit in Person | |
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Visits at the End of Life | |
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Financial and Legal Considerations | |
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Don't Put Off Financial and Legal Planning | |
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Your Expenses: What Are You Spending Now? | |
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Your Income: What's Coming In? | |
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Financial Planning for the Future | |
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Legal Considerations | |
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Special Considerations for Single or Nonbiological Parents | |
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Why Planning Is So Important | |
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The Bottom Line | |
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Genetic Testing for Medical Illness: Your Child's Perspective | |
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When to Consider Genetic Testing for Your Children | |
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Principles to Consider | |
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How to Talk with Your Child About Testing | |
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If Your Child Is Not Biologically Related to You | |
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If the Result Is Positive | |
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If Results Are Different for Siblings | |
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Final Reminder | |
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When to Seek Professional Mental Health Services for Your Child | |
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How Much Has Your Child's Behavior Changed Since the Illness? | |
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Is Your Child Able to Continue to Function in Daily Life? | |
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How to Find a Mental Health Specialist for Your Child | |
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Leaving a Legacy | |
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Guiding Principles | |
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Letting Your Child Choose Something Personal | |
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Existing Family Traditions | |
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Your Child's Name as a Legacy | |
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Legacy Funds | |
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Other Ideas for Your Legacy Gift | |
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Closing Thoughts | |
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Making Decisions About End-of-Life Care | |
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How to Decide Where a Parent Will Be at the End of Life | |
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If a Parent Will Be Cared for in a Residential or Inpatient Hospice | |
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If a Parent Will Be Cared for at Home | |
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Discuss How Children Want to Hear About a Parent's Death | |
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Funerals and Memorial Services | |
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Family Conflict Makes Planning Harder | |
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Making Your Child's Needs the Priority | |
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How Young Is Too Young? | |
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Planning the Funeral Is a Family Process | |
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Memorial Services | |
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Closing Words | |
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Epilogue: Your Child's Bright Future | |
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Resources | |
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Index | |