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| Acknowledgments | |
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| Children of the Night: Who are these Emotional Vampires? | |
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| Are They Really Vampires? | |
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| Antisocial Vampires | |
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| Histrionic Vampires | |
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| Narcissistic Vampires | |
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| Obsessive-Compulsive Vampires | |
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| Paranoid Vampires | |
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| Maturity and Mental Health: If Emotional Vampires are children, what does it take to be a grown-up? | |
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| What Causes People to Become Emotional Vampires? | |
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| Immaturity versus Evil | |
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| The Everybody and Nobody Rule | |
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| What If You See Yourself? | |
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| The Way of Vampires: How Emotional Vampires are different, and more dangerous than other annoying people | |
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| Vampires Are Different | |
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| Vampires Prey on Humans | |
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| Vampires Can Change Their Shapes | |
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| Vampires Can't See Themselves in a Mirror | |
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| Vampires Are More Powerful in the Dark | |
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| A Vampire's Bite Can Turn You into a Vampire | |
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| Protecting Yourself from Vampires | |
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| Dark Powers: Emotional Vampires use hypnosis. Here's how to keep them from making you think you're a chicken | |
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| The Structure of Magic | |
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| Recognizing Hypnosis When You See It | |
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| The Danger Signs of Hypnosis | |
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| Hypnosis and Seduction | |
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| What to Do If You Discover You've Been Hypnotized | |
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| The Antisocial Types: Lovable Rogues | |
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| The Ferrari-Toyota Dilemma | |
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| How to Recognize an Antisocial Vampire | |
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| The Antisocial Emotional Vampire Checklist: Listening to the Call of the Wild | |
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| Vampire Daredevils: Sexy, thrilling, and definitely bad for your health | |
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| The Physiology of Excitement | |
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| Daredevil Hypnosis | |
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| How Vampires Keep You Coming Back for More | |
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| The 10 Elements of Vampire Fighting Strategy: Resisting the Forbidden Fruit | |
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| Vampire Used Car Salesmen: Slicker than cheap polyester, so always remember to read the fine print | |
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| Used Car Hypnosis | |
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| Is Honesty Really the Best Policy? | |
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| How Do You Tell If Somebody Is Lying? | |
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| The 10 Elements of Vampire Fighting Strategy: Protect Yourself from Predators in Polyester | |
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| Vampire Bullies: Big, scary, powerful, and stupid as the guys who used to take lunch money | |
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| The Instinct for Aggression | |
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| Vampire Bully Hypnosis | |
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| What to Do About Bullies | |
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| How to Do the Unexpected | |
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| The 10 Elements of Vampire Fighting Strategy: Don't Let Vampires Kick Sand in Your Face | |
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| Therapy for Antisocial Vampires | |
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| The Histrionic Types: Show Business, Vampire Style | |
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| What's It Like to Be Histrionic | |
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| The Histrionic Dilemma | |
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| The Histrionic Vampire Checklist: Living a Soap Opera | |
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| Vampires Who Ham It Up: Whether it's sex, sickness, or secrets of success, there's only one show business | |
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| Ham-it-up Hypnosis | |
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| Writing a Safe Role for Yourself | |
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| Illness as Theater | |
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| Histrionic Vampires and Motivation | |
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| The 10 Elements of Vampire Fighting Strategy: How to Keep from Joining the Cast | |
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| Passive-Aggressive Vampires: Deliver us from ghoulies and ghosties and people who are only trying to help | |
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| Giving Until It Hurts | |
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| Illness as Metaphor | |
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| Passive-Aggressive Hypnosis | |
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| Passive-Aggressive Behavior in Relationships | |
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| The High Self-Esteem Syndrome | |
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| The 10 Elements of Vampire Fighting Strategy: Enduring the Terrible Meek | |
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| Therapy for Histrionic Vampires | |
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| The Narcissistic Types: Big Egos, Small Everywhere Else | |
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| What It's Like to Be Narcissistic | |
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| The Narcissistic Dilemma | |
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| Narcissism and Self-Esteem | |
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| The Narcissistic Vampire Checklist: Identifying the Smartest, Most Talented, All-Around Best Person in the World | |
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| Vampires Who Are Legends in Their Own Minds: With talent like theirs, who needs performance? | |
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| How Narcissistic Legends Prevent Themselves from Succeeding | |
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| Narcissistic Legend Hypnosis | |
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| Another Narcissistic Dilemma | |
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| How to Socialize Narcissistic Legends | |
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| The 10 Elements of Vampire Fighting Strategy: Getting Geniuses to Do Something Useful for a Change | |
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| Vampire Superstars: You've got to love these guys! Worship them, actually | |
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| Dealing with Superstars' Insatiable Needs | |
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| Special People Expect Special Treatment | |
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| Who Cares What the Little People Think! | |
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| Superstar Hypnosis | |
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| Superstar Sex | |
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| The Plot to Change Superstars' Style | |
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| Superstar Depression and Anger | |
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| The 10 Elements of Vampire Fighting Strategy: How to Stop Being Treated Like a Groupie | |
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| Therapy for Narcissistic Vampires | |
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| The Obsessive-Compulsive Types: Too Much of a Good Thing | |
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| What It's Like to Be Obsessive-Compulsive | |
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| How Much Is Too Much? | |
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| Punishment, Where Good and Evil Meet | |
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| The Obsessive-Compulsive Vampire Checklist: Vice Masquerading as Virtue | |
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| Vampire Perfectionists and Puritans: Can the undead be anal-retentive? | |
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| Why Do They Always Seem Angry? | |
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| Obsessive-Compulsive Hypnosis | |
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| Product versus Process | |
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| Demanding Priorities | |
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| Perfectionists | |
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| How the Imperfect Can Deal with Perfectionists | |
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| Puritans | |
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| Why Are Puritans So Mean? | |
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| Dealing with Puritans without Getting Burned | |
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| The 10 Elements of Vampire Fighting Strategy: What to Do When the Good Guys Are After You | |
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| Therapy for Obsessive-Compulsive Vampires | |
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| The Paranoid Types: Seeing Things That Others Can't | |
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| Paranoid Purity | |
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| What It's Like to Be Paranoid | |
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| The Narcissist-Paranoid Dilemma | |
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| The Paranoid Emotional Vampire Checklist: Next Stop, the Twilight Zone | |
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| Vampire Visionaries and Green-Eyed Monsters: Inspiration always involves blowing things out of proportion | |
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| The Paranoid Quest | |
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| Paranoid Hypnosis | |
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| Visionaries | |
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| How to Recognize Crazy Ideas | |
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| Paranoids and Religion | |
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| Green-Eyed Monsters | |
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| The 10 Elements of Vampire Fighting Strategy: How to Give Paranoids a Glimpse of Reality | |
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| Therapy for Paranoid Vampires | |
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| Sunrise at Carfax Abbey | |
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| Index | |