It Sucked and Then I Cried How I Had a Baby, a Breakdown, and a Much Needed Margarita

Name: It Sucked and Then I Cried How I Had a Baby, a Breakdown, and a Much Needed Margarita
Price: 2.73 USD
Availability: InStock
ISBN: 9781439171509

ISBN-10: 1439171505

ISBN-13: 9781439171509

Edition: N/A

Authors: Heather B. Armstrong

List price: $21.99

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Book details

List price: $21.99
Publisher: Simon & Schuster
Publication date: 3/23/2010
Binding: Paperback
Pages: 272
Size: 6.00" wide x 9.00" long x 0.80" tall
Weight: 0.638
Language: English



Prologue



Let the Anxiety Commence



How to Exploit an Unborn Baby



A Twenty-pound Basketball With Legs and Arms



Dressing Like a Concubine in Humpty Dumpty's Harem



Labor to the Tune of Janet Jackson's Nipple



You Have to Peed the Baby ... Through Your Boobs



Sympathy for the World



It's All Fun and Games Until Someone Pokes Their Eye Out With a Baby



The Dive That Turned Into a Belly Flop



Your Biological Clock Is a Dumbass



Other Mothers: Your Harshest Critics



Trusting the Wisdom of a Dog



Finally, Proof That I Was in the Room When She Was Conceived



Heather, Interrupted



Her Screamness Who Screams a Lot Every Day With the Screaming



If Your Wife Is Pregnant, You Might Want to Skip This One



My Arms Spread Completely Wide



I Never Thought I Would Become This Woman


Afterword


Acknowledgments