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Introduction | |
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In the Beginning... | |
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For His Eyes Only: Ladies, Please Skip This Passage | |
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My Date with Destiny: October 27, 1985 | |
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The Wedding and the Honeymoon | |
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Our Wedding Day: Countdown to Cake | |
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George of the Wedding Jungle: W's Dos and Don'ts | |
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What's a Honeymoon? A History Lesson | |
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Adam and Steve: My Accidental Honeymoon | |
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Lovers and Lepers: My Honeymoon with Meg Ryan | |
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Honeymoon Horror Story: The Man from Glad | |
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Porn to Be Wild: Should You Camcorder Everything? | |
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A for Effort: Grading the Honeymoon | |
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Marriage | |
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You're Mr. & Mrs. Happy: Now What? | |
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What We Really Want: The Lowdown on Love | |
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I Can See Clearly Now: The End of the Honeymoon Effect | |
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From "I Do" to "Uh-oh": Retraining the New Hire | |
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Wedding Ca$her$: I Married a Cheapskate | |
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Love Me (Legal) Tender: Marrieds and Money | |
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Tastes Like Chicken: The Fear Factor | |
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The Edit Sweet: Honesty | |
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Married to the Mom: In-laws | |
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I Dropped When I Shopped: Gift Fatigue | |
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Saturday-Night Fights: How to Argue Without Gunplay | |
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Oh No, It's Geraldo! When There's an Age Difference | |
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Rules of Engagement: Married in the Military | |
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Gimme Shelter: Your First Home | |
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A Moving Experience: Relocating Your Family | |
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The Aliens Next Door: Your Neighbors | |
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Mr. Handy: Home Remodeling | |
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King of Pain: Should I Go to the Hospital? | |
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When I'm Dead, She's Rich: Wife Insurance | |
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Pet of the Year: Animal House | |
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Volun-teers of a Clown: Public Service | |
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Good Sports: Playing Together | |
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Our Marriage Is Perfect, Let's Date! An Experiment | |
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Kids | |
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Growing Your Family Tree: What Are You In For? | |
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Pee on the Stick: Pregnancy | |
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Dial M for Mother: Delivery Day | |
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Sorry, Tallulah's Taken: Naming the Baby | |
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Breast Intentions: Feeding in Public | |
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Fear Factor: Baby Monitoring | |
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Nannygate: Finding a Babysitter | |
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Say What? Kids Say the Darnedest Things | |
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Parent Trap: A Parent's Pop Quiz | |
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Making the Grade: Time for School | |
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My Boy in the Bubble: Are You Too Protective? | |
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Where Did We Go Wrong? Worst-Case Scenarios | |
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Crime and Punishment: Discipline | |
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The Birds, the Bees, the Carrot: Talking About Sex | |
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Dine and Dash: Feeding Time | |
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Frequent-Crier Miles: Traveling with Kids | |
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Almost Rubbed Out by Rudolph: Freak Accidents | |
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My Father the Spy, My Mother the Murderer: What Parents Do for Their Kids | |
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Be Prepared: Girl and Boy Scouts | |
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The Coach Bag: Going Out for the Team | |
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The Graduate: Kids and College | |
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Mature Topics | |
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Where Do I Plug This In? Appliances | |
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I Love You, You're Perfect, Now Wear This Thong: Do Not Attempt This at Home | |
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The Love Machine, by Kenmore: Mom and Dad Take a Time-out | |
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Porn Losers: When You See Things You Should Not | |
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Me Tarzan, You Neighbor: Swingers | |
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Troubleshooting | |
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Kill Him with Kindness: Desperate Housewives | |
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The Doctor Is In, the Parking Lot: Affairs | |
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When It Hits the Fan: Kathie Lee and Frank Gifford | |
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Mother of All Arguments: The Prenup | |
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Happily Ever After | |
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Cracking the Code: The Secret to a Long, Happy Marriage | |
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"Yes, Dear, Pour Me a Beer": The Longest Marriage on Earth | |
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Honeymooner Hall of Fame: Real-Life Success Stories | |
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Peggy Sue Got Married: Marrying Your High School Sweetheart | |
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The 4-H Club: Recipe for a Happy Marriage | |
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Where's the Tabasco? How to Keep Marriage Exciting | |
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The Not-So-Newlywed Game: Five Questions for Your Spouse | |
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Niagara Falls Plus Fifty: Good News: Love Lasts | |
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I'm Almost Out of Toner: Final Thoughts | |
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Author Thank-Yous and Shout-Outs | |